"Before we go on," said Pete,
"Harry still needs to explain 'situation ethics'."
"Right," said Harry. "I
almost forget. Well, those of an age to have experienced 'the
Sixties' will remember the phrase."
"Love the one you're with,"
murmured Jenny, absently.
"I beg your pardon?" Donna inquired.
Jenny blushed. Harry gallantly rescued
her. "Jenny was just remembering one of the specific
ways the ethic was manifested. Probably the watchword of the whole
philosophy, however, was 'if it feels right, do it'. In other
words, there were no specific rules about anything. You let the
current circumstances dictate the reaction. The situation decided
the response."
Most of them looked at him blankly. "So,"
prompted Pete, "How does this interesting tidbit of historical
information ties back to what we were talking about?"
"Oh, wasn't that clear? Well, I think
Jesus practiced 'situation ethics'."
"Love the one you're with?"
Bev suggested, with feigned innocence.
"No, love, the other slogan: if it
feels right, do it. I remember Josh's last several Bible studies
when he was trying to get people to understand the real 'law'.
He showed us that Jesus is trying to get us to see that our responses
to situations shouldn't be based on some bit of legalism, but
should come from love and from a Holy Spirit discernment of what
people really need at a given moment. 'Religion' doesn't care
about real people; Christ does."
"So," mused Pete, "Even
though divorce is 'wrong', you're saying that in some instances
God might prefer that His own rule be broken?"
"I think so, but I know it would
be a controversial concept to many Christians. But just as an
example, I've heard a lot of talk about how Christian wives and
husbands should sacrifice themselves and stay with their unsaved
spouses, no matter how bad things are, because their perseverance
might eventually lead to their spouses being saved. Well, I admit
it might happen - in fact, I know that occasionally it does happen
- but I really question whether it is sufficient justification
for a zillion unhappy, abusive, or should plain wrong marriages
to go on." He paused a moment. "Come to think of it,
I just remembered what may be good scriptural evidence against
the likelihood of spouses converting spouses. Remember that Jesus
had a terrible time with the people in his own home town?"
Pete agreed. "Because they thought
they knew Him pretty well, they couldn't believe His new message.
He passed it off by saying that a prophet didn't have any honor
in his own country."
Bev took up the theme. "I think God
would like all marriages to go on forever. In a perfect world,
they'd all be gloriously happy, too. But this world isn't perfect,
so I agree with Harry: some marriages may bring more glory to
God by being terminated than they would by continuing."
Donna was looking a little troubled. "I
think I agree, but give me another example of 'situation ethics'
for Christians."
Harry thought. "How about 'honor
your father and mother'? I'm not sure I know exactly what that
means, but I think a lot of Christians have no doubt that it means
to love them unconditionally, respect their judgment, and bow
to their wishes. I'm sorry! I had pretty good parents, but I couldn't
follow those rules unequivocally. And what about all those people
who had really bad parents? How many people are there going through
life guilty and defeated because they've been told they have to
love those fathers and mothers who never loved them, or who abused
them, and they just can't do it? Forgive them, maybe in time,
but love? They can't!"
"Was it Jesus who said to live in
peace with all men, in as much as it is possible?" mused
Pete.
"No," said Harry, "It was Paul, in 'Romans', but I think Jesus would have agreed, and it does tie in with what I'm saying. We take it as far as we can - as far as the circumstances warrant."
"Here's another way to think of it,"
said Evalyn. "I mean, what I was thinking was that there's
no way God could put down on paper every possible situation we
would find ourselves in, so that all we had to do was read the
list."
"It wouldn't be the Bible,"
Harry broke in. "It might be called 'Six Jillion Situations
and How to Handle Them'."
"In twenty-five volumes," finished
Pete.
"If you're through, gentlemen...
" They were. "But even if there could be that giant
list, I was also thinking that there isn't always just one right
answer, one thing that is always the right thing to do
in a particular situation. Usually there's something a little
bit different about each circumstance, and it takes some thought
(sometimes a lot of it!) to make the right choice for that situation.
I think the Holy Spirit could help us a lot in the times when
it isn't cut and dried, or black and white."
"I don't understand what you mean
about there not always being just one right answer," said
Charley.
"Okay, as an example, suppose a child
does a bad thing and gets hurt because of it. Depending on the
circumstances, a mother might hug him or spank him. And any one
of a number of other actions might be appropriate at that particular
moment. Mothers try to guess right, but they don't, always. Usually
it's because they're too emotionally involved to think out the
right response. Woman's intuition is great, but it doesn't always
do the job."
"And you're saying that the Holy
Spirit could help you make the right choice, even in an emotional
situation?" asked Ed.
"That's what I think. I also thought
of another example that may be clearer. Say a friend is feeling
really down. Do you: let her cry on your shoulder; tell her to
'be a man about it'; tell her it's not really all that bad and
she'll get over it; or tell her it's all for the best? Or do you
give her advice about what to do to get out of her blue funk?"
"That depends," answered Charley
Sure, it does, but what does it depend on? Do you always know? Are you always sure? Do you see what I mean? As Christians, I think we need to be able to have the right responses to help people. Wouldn't it be great if the Holy Spirit would just whisper to you 'let her cry' or 'give her a pep talk'? Wouldn't that be freeing for both her and you?"
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NOTE: This discussion comes from Chapters 22 and 54 of "If God is God," by Sandy Wilbur. Read more, or order a copy of the whole book.