AN ACCOUNT OF THE LIFE
OF
THAT
ANCIENT
SERVANT OF JESUS CHRIST,
JOHN
RICHARDSON
“He that heareth you heareth me, and he that despiseth you despiseth me, and he that despiseth me, despiseth him that sent me.”
Luke X.21
PHILADELPHIA:
FOR
SALE AT FRIENDS’ BOOK STORE,
No.
804 ARCH STREET
1880
TESTIMONY OF FRIENDS
The Testimony of
Friends belonging to Gisbrough Monthly Meeting, concerning our worthy friend JOHN
RICHARDSON, who departed this life near Hutton-in-the-Hole, the 2d of the
Fourth month, 1753, in the eighty-seventh year of his age, and was buried in
Friends’ burying-ground at Kirby-moorside.
As many of
our elders are removed, and but few left who had personal knowledge of this
Friend in his younger years and early part of his service, we cannot give so
full an account thereof as otherwise might have been done.
By accounts
transmitted to us, we have cause to believe he was much devoted, and given up
to walk in the way of his duty, and therein was of great service to the
churches where his lot was cast; and an instrument in the Divine hand in
turning many to righteousness.
As to the
latter part of his life, we have this testimony to give of him; that we was a
lover of discipline and good order in the church, diligent in attending
meetings for worship and Truth’s service, whilst of ability; a good example
therein, by sitting in a still and unaffected manner in silence, and when
raised up to bear a public testimony, was comfortable and acceptable to
Friends.
And when
his natural faculties were somewhat impaired, and he confined at home through
old age and infirmities, he appeared more and more heavenly-minded, and seemed
to grow in the life of religion, that we hope he is now at rest in the fruition
of that happiness, prepared for such as hold on to the end in well-doing.
Signed on behalf of the said meeting, held at Castleton, on the 22nd
of the third month, 1764.
The Testimony of
Friends from the Quarterly Meeting held at York
On reading
the testimony given from the Monthly Meeting of Gisbrough, concerning our late
ancient and worthy friend John Richardson, deceased, of which we approve, we
find ourselves under an engagement to add this short testimony; from certain
experience of the service he had amongst us in a fresh and lively ministry, and
in exercising the discipline of the church in a Gospel spirit, whereby many
received comfort and edification; some of us having knowledge of him from his
early appearance in the ministry,
remember that he was acceptable to Friends, being sound in doctrine,
reaching the witness of God in those to whom he ministered. He was a diligent and faithful labourer,
traveling several times through most parts of this nation, and visited Friends’
meetings in Scotland and Ireland, also twice the English plantations in
America, leaving many seals of his ministry, having had the approbation and
unity of Friends with his service both at home and abroad. He was a tender nursing father, in the
church, over the youth whom God had visited, to encourage and strengthen the
newly convinced, to whom also he was good example; and though of a sweet and
courteous disposition, yet careful in the spirit of wisdom, to caution and
guard such against the deceitful workings and false representations of the
spirit of error. To divers of us who
visited him towards the close of his time, he appeared in a heavenly frame of
mind, to our great comfort, evidencing a preparation for that eternal bliss whereinto,
we doubt not, he is entered, and now reaps the fruits of his labours.
Signed in and on behalf of our
Quarterly Meeting, held at York, the 27th and 28th of the
third month, 1754.
THE
LIFE
OF
JOHN
RICHARDSON
CHAPTER I
Parentage – Account of his Father – Birth – Youthful Follies and Early
Visitations – Great Mental Conflicts --
Retired Life -- Aversion to Quakers and their Plain Way of Life -- Religious Convictions -- Labours for his
Mother’s Support and his own -- His Mother’s Second Marriage -- Unkind
Treatment by his Step-father -- Difficulties in Getting to Meetings -- Appears
in the Ministry – Turned out of his Step-father’s House – Binds himself to a
Weaver – Kindness of his Master – Healed of his Lameness and Stammering – First
Journey as a Minister – Learns Clockmaking – Travels in Different Parts of
England – Disputes with Different Professors – Various Openings – Marriage –
Parentage and Character of his Wife – Death and Last Expressions of his Wife –
Vision – Prophecy – Remarkable Cure.
It has been
repeatedly revived in my mind, to leave the following account concerning my
dear father, William Richardson, having seen something of his own in
manuscript, concerning his convincement, with remarks on some other things; but
I being young when he died, did not then much heed it, and when I would gladly
have seen it for my own satisfaction, I could not, nor as yet can meet with it.
As my
father was early convinced of the Truth, a sufferer for it, and bore a public
testimony to it, I found it my duty, as nearly as I could remember the contents
thereof, to leave this short account concerning him.
He was born
at North Cave, in the eastern part of Yorkshire, in the year 1624, of honest
parents, and of good repute, and was educated in the Episcopal way, being
soberly inclined from his childhood; a lover and seeker after purity and
virtue. I have heard him say he gave
his mind much to retirement, reading the Holy Scriptures, and seeking after the
Lord, especially in the fields, being by calling a shepherd; and it pleased the
Lord to open his understanding so clearly, that he saw and longed for a more
excellent dispensation to come. He also
saw that the priests were wrong, and generally proud and covetous, so that he
was weary of following them, and much weaned from them and all company, except
two or three men who met with him, and spoke one to another concerning their
inward conditions, and what they had experienced of the Lord’s dealings with
them. This was before they had heard of
the name Quaker, as it was in a short time after given to a people which the
Lord raised up to give testimony of the notable and ancient, yet newly revived
and blessed, dispensation of Christ’s coming, and manifestation by the Holy
Spirit in the hearts of the children of men, in order to enlighten, quicken
sanctify, and save them from darkness, death, ignorance and sin, that they
might be made capable of obeying, worshipping and glorifying the great God and
sanctifier of them.
As my
father was thus waiting and looking for a more general breaking forth of this
glorious, powerful, and Gospel day, which had in a good degree sprung up in his
heart, he had not, as yet, seen that worthy and good man, George Fox, although
he passed through those parts about that time; but soon after came William
Dewsbury, and at the sound of his voice, I have heard my father say, he was
exceedingly glad, in hearing him declare the way to find the lost piece of
silver, the pearl of great price within, a Savior near, who had been held forth
by men to be at a distance. But having
left the dark watchmen, of whom they used to inquire, they now met with their
beloved at home, in their own bosoms; renowned be the name of the Lord, now and
forever.
Thus the
hearing and receiving the ever blessed Truth, was as the seed, or word of the
kingdom, sown in the good ground, or honest hearts of men, which took root
downward and sprang upward, and brought forth fruit, in some thirty, In some
sixty, and in others an hundred fold, to the praise of the great and good
Husbandman.
My father
was early raised to bear a public testimony, which was living and acceptable to
Friends, but was so much attended with weakness of body for many years, that he
went little abroad in the work of the ministry. He suffered patiently the spoiling of his goods, and imprisonment
of his weakly body, in the great and more general imprisonment; and not only
believed in Jesus Christ, but suffered for him. He was a good neighbour, a loving husband, and a tender father over
all that was good, but severe to all that which was wrong, and was for
judgment, without respect of persons, and spared not even his own children;
especially, he was much concerned for me, for, he said, I was the wildest of
them. As he lived well and believed in
Jesus Christ, I doubt not that he has finished his course in the love and
favour of God, is entered into a mansion of glory, and is at rest with all the
faithful, who “loved not their lives unto death,” but rather hated them in
comparison of that endeared and unfeigned love they bore to God the Father, and
to Jesus Christ his dear and well-beloved Son, who died for the, and also for
the whole world.
He departed
this life in 1679, aged about fifth-five years, and was decently buried in
Friends’ burying-place at Hotham, near Cave, where he was born.
Having
given the foregoing account of my father, it remains with me to leave to
posterity some remarks on my convincement, with an account of sundry
transactions, travels, healings and deliverance I have met with, from my youth
to this day, with some advice and openings in the Spirit of Truth.
I was not
above thirteen years of age when my father died, yet the Lord was at work by
his Light, grace and Holy Spirit in my heart; but I knew not then what it was
which inwardly disquieted my mind, when any thing which was evil prevailed over
the good in me, which it oftentimes did, for want of taking heed to the spirit
of God in my heart. I desired ease and
peace some other way, without taking up the cross of Christ to my own corrupt
will, and strove for some time, as no doubt many do, to make merry over the
just witness, until for a season the converting and true witness of God seemed
to be slain, or disappeared. Then I took
liberty, but not in gross evils which many ran into, being preserved
religiously inclined, seeking after professors, and inquiring of them, for my
information and satisfaction, to find, if I could, any thing that was safe for
me to rest in, or any true and solid comfort to my poor disconsolate and
bewildered soul. But I was afraid I
should be deceived, or take up a false rest in any thing that was wrong or
unsafe; which fear was of the great love and mercy of God to me. After many searches and inquiries among
those who were but in the letter and outward court, where the veil is over the
understanding, and the eye of the mind is not truly opened to see into things
that are hid form all carnal-minded men; so my state and afflictions were hid
from them, and all the deceitful workings of Satan, and the strong temptations
which I met with, these blind guides could not see, nor did they know how to
direct me to the true Shepherd of Israel, the Law-giver coming out of Sion,
that turns away ungodliness from Jacob, and transgression from Israel; not having
truly experienced deliverance wrought in themselves out of this cloudy,
bewildered and tempted state which I was in.
Oh! that people would come to
him that hath the eye-salve, with which if the eye be truly anointed, it will
see things clearly as they are and not darkly, mistaking trees for men, and
things terrestrial for things celestial; and that they would buy gold, tried by
the fire of him who is call the Tried Stone, elect and precious, laid in Sion
for a foundation. This is Christ whom
the true church believes in and builds upon, and is enriched with his love,
power, and virtue, which is better than gold outwardly: this is the unction,
which the true church hath, and receives from Christ, the Holy One; and such as
do truly put on his righteousness, purity, and holiness, their clothing is
better than that of fine linen outwardly.
Oh! that all the inhabitants of the earth might be thus anointed,
enriched and truly clothed, that no more inward blindness or poverty may be
found in the children of men, nor the shame of their nakedness be any more
seen.
Receive and
learn these things, you that can, of him that is the faithful and true witness,
who always witnesseth against the evil in man, but always giveth witness to the
Father, for the good in men which they say and think. This is the Spirit of him that was dead, and is alive, no more to
be known after the flesh, as the apostle gave testimony, but is to be known
inwardly and spiritually by the children of men, to open the blind eye, and
unstop the deaf ear, and pierce into the soul that hath been clouded and
captivated, imprisoned, and misguided, and even in a wilderness, and sees no
way for deliverance; like Israel in the land of Egypt, when the Lord Jehovah
sent Moses, a lively type of Christ, and employed him in that great work of
pleading with, and plaguing Pharaoh and the Egyptians. For a time their burthens were increased,
and their exercises more embittered, until their deliverance was in a good degree
accomplished; and which was not wrought until the first-born of man, and of
beast, was slain, throughout all the land of Egypt.
The clear
opening I had in the light, of what is to be understood and gathered from
hence, is not the slaying of the outward man, but a putting off, or slaying the
body of the sins of the flesh, crucifying or putting off the old man with his
deeds; and as to the beast, all cruelty, lust, pushing, tearing, devouring and
savageness, is to be slain or put away; and the corrupt or strong will of man,
as well as what is bestial, must be slain before man can come from under the
power of him who is called the Prince of the power of the air, the spirit that
rules in the hearts of the children of disobedience. These things must be experienced, before the children of men can
go forth rightly qualified to glorify God, and follow his dear Son, whom he
hath appointed to be a leader and a commander of his people. This is he, as Moses declares, who is to be
heard in all things, under the penalty of being cut off from the people; or of
having their names blotted out of the book of life; or being deprived of the
comforts of the Lord’s holy presence.
Read this, you who have heard and understood what the Spirit saith unto
the churches. These things I saw, after
the true witness arose or revived in me, and the light shone which had
disappeared or been clouded.
After much
searching without, amongst those who proved to me physicians of no value, and
miserable comforters, I betook myself to a lonesome and retired life, breathing
after, and seeking the Lord in the fields and private places, beseeching him,
that he would bring me to the saving knowledge of his truth; and blessed be the
name of the Lord now and forever, I had not sought him long with all my heart,
before I met with his inward appearance to me, in and by his Holy Spirit, light
and grace. But when the true Light did
begin to shine more clearly, and the living witness arose in my inward man, oh!
then my undone, bewildered, and miserable condition began to appear, and great
and unutterable were my conflicts and distress. I thought no man’s condition upon the face of the earth was like
mine. I thought I was not fit to die,
neither did I know how to live. I
thought in the evening, “Oh that it was morning!” and in the morning, “that it
was evening!” I had many solitary walks in the fields and other places, in
which I poured out my complaints and cries before the Lord, with fervent
supplications to him, that he would look upon my affliction and the strong
temptations I was under, and that he would rebuke the adversary of my soul, and
deliver it, for I even thought it was in the jaws of a devouring lion, and
amongst the fiery spirits, and, as it were, under the weight of the
mountains. Read and understand the
afflictions of thy brother, thou that has come through great tribulations, and
hast washed and made thy garments white in the blood of the Lamb. This is the beginning of that baptism which
doth save, and of that washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Ghost,
which the Lord sheds upon believers in abundance. This is the blood which sprinkleth the heart from an evil
conscience, that the children of men, thus changed, may serve the living and
true God; this is the life which converts the world, even as many as are
converted; this is the virtue, life, and blood, which maketh clean the saints’
garments, and inwardly washeth them from all filthiness, both of flesh and
spirit. I found this was and is He of
whom it is said, “By him were all things made, and he is Lord of all;” a man
ought to be servant to him, and all things in man subservient to him, who
commands and comprehends all things, in whom all the types and shadows end, or
are fulfilled. Read this, thou virgin
daughter, or clean church of Christ, the rock of thy strength, whose name to
thee is as precious ointment poured fourth, and because of the savour thereof,
the virgins love him, and are under great obligations to obey and follow the
Lamb of God, wheresoever he leadeth.
Although I
had seen many things, and had divers openings, yet great were my trials, and
many were the temptations I met with in those days, for I lived at a distance
from Friends and meetings, which made my exercise the harder, as will more
fully appear hereafter, in the course of my travels and pilgrimage in this vale
of tears and troubles, and some of them not very common; but the Lord helped me
through them all, blessed be his name for ever.
I now came
to witness that Scripture to be fulfilled which saith, that “When the Lord’s judgments
are in the earth,” or earthly hearts of men, “the inhabitants learn
righteousness:” and notwithstanding there was an aversion in my wild nature to
the people in scorn called Quakers, as also to the name itself, yet when the
afflicting hand of the Lord was upon me for my disobedience, and when, like
Ephraim and Judah, I saw in the light my hurt and my wound, I bemoaned myself,
and mourned over that just principle of light and grace in me, which I had
pierced with my sins and disobedience.
Although that ministration of condemnation was glorious in its time, yet
great were my troubles, which humbled my mind, and made me willing to deny
myself of every thing which the light made known in me to be evil, I being in
great distress, and wanting peace and assurance of the love of God to my soul;
the weight of which so humbled my mind that I knew not of any calling, people,
practice, or principle that was lawful and right, which I could not embrace, or
fall in with. This was surely like the
day of Jacob’s troubles, and David’s fears.
I saw that the filth of Sion was to be purged away by the Spirit of
judgment and of burning; this is the way of the deliverance and recovery of
poor men out of the fall, and the time of the restoration of the kingdom to
God’s true Israel. Read ye that can,
and understand. This was the day of my
baptism into the love of God, and true faith in his beloved Son, as also into a
feeling of, or sympathy with him in his sufferings, which were unutterable, and
I found that ministration changed; that which had been unto death, was now unto
life; and the ministration which was of condemnation unto the first birth, when
that was slain, and in a good degree nailed or fastened to the cross of Christ,
the power of God, then the good prevailed over the evil, and working out the
evil in the mind, and also in the members, made all good or holy. The Lord’s living power, and consuming word,
when it works and prevails, brings into subjection, and maketh holy the very
heart or ground in men.
As there
had been an aversion to me to the people called in scorn Quakers, and also to
their strict living, and demeanor, plainness of habit and language, so I
learned none of these from them; for when the Lord changed my heart, he also
changed my thoughts, words, and ways, and there became an aversion in me to
vice, sin, and vanity, as there had been to the ways of virtue. Having tasted of the terrors and judgments
of God because of sin, I was warned to flee from such things as occasioned
Christ’s coming not to bring peace upon the earth, but a sword; a sword indeed,
yea, his heart-penetrating, searching word, which is sharper than any two-edged
sword, that pierceth to the dividing asunder between flesh and spirit, joints
and marrow. As I came thus to see and
abhor the evil in myself, when such who had been my companions in vanity
reviled me, or came in my way, I was often moved to warn and reprove them. Having tasted of the terrors of the Lord for
sin, I could not well forbear to warn others to flee such things I had been
judged for. Now I came clearly to be
convinced about hat-honour, bowing the knee, and the corrupt language, as well
as finery in habit; all which, for conscience-sake, and the peace thereof, I
came to deny, and take up the cross to, and had great peace in so doing.
Notwithstanding
the blessed truth thus prevailed in me, I was not without great conflicts of
spirit, temptations, and trials of divers kinds; yet my mind was resigned to
the Lord, and my fervent prayers were to him, and he kept me, and opened my
understanding, for I was afraid of being misled in any thing, especially
relating to my salvation. I came to be
weaned from all my companions and lovers in whom I had taken delight, and all
things in this world were little to me, my being much redeemed out of the
world, not only the corrupt and evil part thereof, but even from the lawful
part; so that I became much given up to seek the Lord, waiting upon him to feel
his presence, and peace, and to know his will, and receive power to do the same.
As my mind
came to be thus brought into a dependent and waiting frame upon the Lord, and
to be stayed in the light, and experimentally and feelingly to partake of his
love and grace, which helped me against my infirmities, blessed be his name, I
found it sufficient for me, as I kept to it, in all trials and
temptations. Then I came to see, that
all outward performances in matters of religion did not avail nor render man
acceptable to God, but as the heart came to be truly given up to him, that he
might not only purge it from defilement, but keep it clean through the
indwelling of his Holy Spirit. As
nearly as I remember, I saw clearly through these things before the sixteenth
year of my age. Between the death of my
father and this time, I took liberty to go among what people I would, my mother
giving us great liberty, although she was a woman well accounted of among all
who knew her, and not undeservedly, for her industry and fair dealing
concerning the things of this world.
After this
time I attended the meetings of the Lord’s people called Quakers, as diligently
as my circumstances would well admit.
My mother being left with five children, the youngest about three years
old when my father died, and he leaving but little of this world to bring us
up, though my parents always had as much as kept them above contempt, and
nobody lost by them; I found myself under a necessity to work hard for my own
support, the help of my mother, and education of my brothers, more especially
as my only sister died soon after.
Being left
on a grazing farm, part of which was tilled, we did well as to the things of
this world, yet I cannot well omit mentioning one thing which became a great
exercise to me, which was thus: My mother married one who was zealous for the
Presbytery, and being much against it, I showed my dislike to the marriage, and
told my mother, I was afraid that she had too much an eye to what he had, for
he was counted rich as to this world; but if she thought to augment our portion
in so marrying, the hand of the Lord
would be against her, and a blasting or mildew would come upon even that which
we had got through industry and hard labour, and what the Lord had intended to
bless to us, if we kept faithful to the truth, and contented ourselves with our
present condition. My mother confessed,
that as to the worldly enjoyments, it had not been better with her than
now. I must write with great caution;
she was my mother, and a tender mother over me, loath to offend me, and had
promised, as far as she well durst, not to marry with any one with whom I was
not satisfied. Of their procedure in
courtship, and marriage, from this time I was entirely ignorant, until it was
accomplished. But when my poor mother
was married, her cry was, “My son, how shall I ever be able to look him in the
face any more, it will be such a trouble to him! He that hath not at any time
disobliged me – but if I bid him go, he ran; and if I bid him do any thing, he
did it with all his might;” or to that effect, as several told me who heard her. She being married, what we had was mixed
with my father-in-law’s good; my mother died first, and our father married
again, made his will, and dying, left me five shillings for all my part, which
was of right to descend from my own parents upon me. I gave his executors a receipt in full, and there was an end of
all, except some small matter given to my youngest brother, for the rest of my
brothers and sisters were dead. As
nearly as I remember, this marriage was in the eighteenth year of my age, so
that what I foresaw about the blast and mildew, came to pass.
To return
to my account concerning the troubles that attended me while I was in my
father-in-law and mother’s hose; after marriage, we, and what we had, were
removed to his house, except part of the stock left in the ground. I foresaw that I was likely to come to a
great trial, and was brought very low about the marriage, and exercise of mind
concerning my own condition, having many conflicts of spirit, so that I was
almost in despair. Had not the Lord, in
whom I believed, risen in his power, and rebuked the adversary of my soul, I
had been overthrown, and swallowed up in the floods of temptation that were
cast out of the mouth of the dragon after me, in this day of great trouble and
travail; but the God of love and pity saw me, and helped me in my distress, in
an acceptable time. He that heard poor
Ishmael when he cried from under the shrub, and gave relief to him and is
mother, who had gone from Abraham’s house, saw me in this great strait. When I came to my father’s house, he being a
man much given to family duties, saying grace, &c. before and after meat, I
could comply with none of them, except I felt evidently the Spirit of truth to
attend therein, and open the heart and mouth into such duties. The first day I came to the house, being
called to the table with all or most of the family, I thought “Is it now come
to this? I must either displease my heavenly or earthly father:” but, oh! the
awfulness, or deep exercise, which was upon my spirit, and strong cries that
ascended to the Lord for help and preservation that I might not offend
him. My father-in-law sat with his hat
partly off, with his eyes fixed on me, as mine were on him in much fear; so we
continued as long or longer than he used to be in saying grace, as they call
it, but said nothing that we heard. At
length he put on his hat again, to the wonder of the family: neither did he
then, nor ever after, ask me why I did not put off my hat; neither did he
perform that ceremony all the time I stayed with him, which was above one year:
thus the Lord helped me, renowned be his great name now and for ever. My father might seem, for age, spirit, and
understanding, to be much more than a match for me, a poor shrub; but the Lord,
who caused the pillar of cloud to be bright and give light to Israel, and
brought darkness upon the Egyptians, and fought against them, and for Israel, I
believe smote my poor father, that he could not rise up against the power with
which the Lord helped me; for it was not mine but the Lord’s doing, to him be
given the attributes of praise, salvation, and strength, now and for ever. I saw clearly, that there could not be any
true and acceptable worship performed to God, but what was in the Spirit, and
in the Truth; neither could any pray aright, but as the Spirit helped them,
which teacheth how to pray, and what to pray for, and rightly prepares the
mind, and guides it in the performance of every service which the Lord calls
for from his children.
I found my
father-in-law was much displeased with my going to meetings, yet I could not
see what way to appease his displeasure, except in being very diligent in his
business, which I was, rather beyond my ability, working very hard. It is almost incredible what my poor little
weak body went through in those days, but all would not gain his love, for the
longer I staid with him, the more his love declined from me; although I told
him he need not be uneasy about my wages, for I would leave that to himself. I could not see what he could have against
me, except my going to meetings; however that was all he alleged. When his former stratagems would not do, he
offered me a horse to ride on, if I would go with him to his place of worship. I met with many a snib and sour countenance
from him, in my return on foot from meetings, although as seasonably as my body
was capable of performing. On the
first-day mornings my father commonly sent me into the fields a mile or two on
foot, and as far upon a common to look at beasts, horses and sheep, I thought
with a design to weary and make me incapable of going to meetings; all which I
bore patiently, neither ever said, that I remember, this is hard usage; after
this, to the great grief of my poor mother, I had to go two, three, four, five,
and sometimes six miles, to Friends’ meetings.
After I had walked fast, and ran sometimes with my shoes under my arms
for want of time, I have seen many Friends weep, and could not forbear when
they saw me come into the meeting very hot and in a great sweat, they being in
part sensible of the hard task I had to undergo.
There is
one thing somewhat remarkable, which was thus; One first-day morning, when I
was about going to the meeting, my father said, if I would ride upon such a
young mare, as he mentioned, I might; she was one of the greatest of ten or
twelve horses that he kept, about four years old, and had not been ridden
before. I thought his design was more
to hinder me of the meeting than any good to me, or any expectation of getting
his mare rightly broken; but I accepted his offer, only asking how I might
catch her. Having got help to answer
that, she being abroad, I put on the bridle, and mounted the topping beast, and
upon her first resistance, down she came; for that was my way: and if the first
or second fall did not, the third mostly cured them from striving to throw the
rider. I commonly fell upon my feet,
and endeavored so to free my legs that she might not fall upon them, and then
sprang up on her back while down, and made her rise with me; so away we went,
and came in due time to the meeting. I
rode to meetings two or three times, and my father asked me, if the mare did
not carry me soberly: I replied, she did; then I must have her no more, he
would make here his saddle-mare; so I took to my feet again, except some other
such turn came. The Lord’s mighty
power bore me up, and he gave me as it were hinds’ feet, and enabled me to go
through these exercises, and to bear the burthen in the heat of the day of my
trials, inwardly and outwardly, which were many and various.
Now the
last stratagem my father used to hinder my going to meetings was thus: He took
me in his arms in great show of kindness, saying, If I would be as a son to
him, I should find he would be a father to me, expressing something about his
having no near kindred, and more to the same effect he said to my brother
Daniel, who was an innocent, wise, and clean spirited lad. I replied to him, If in thus making me thy
son, thou intends to hinder me from going to meetings, or to oblige me to go
with thee to the Presbyterian meetings, or any thing that is against my
conscience, I cannot upon this bottom be thy son; and, for the same reasons, I
refused to be his hired servant, although he offered to hire me and give me
wages. Now when he saw that neither
frowns, threatenings, hardships, nor
great promises of kindness could prevail with me, he told be bluntly and
roughly, I should stay no longer in his house.
I innocently answered, I could not help it if it must be so, as all I
could do would not give him content, without hurting my conscience, and the
peace of my mind, which, which I valued above all mutable things of this
world. My poor mother heard my pleading
with him, and how I offered to do the best for him I was capable of by night or
day, as I had always done, if he would be easy, and let me have his
countenance. But this was the sentence:
No, I should not stay in the house.
That troubled my mother so, that I was forced to leave my father, and go
to endeavour to mitigate her great trouble by telling her, that if I was but
faithful, the Lord, I believed, would take care of me that I should not want; and the more fully to
discharge myself, I reminded her, that as she had entered into marriage
covenants with her husband, she should endeavour to perform them, and in every
thing faithfully to discharge herself as a wife ought to do to a husband, and
leave me and all, and cleave to him, and to make here life as easy as she
could. I also told her, never to send
me any thing that my father knew not of, for I was not free to receive it;
although what we had was in his hand, and all sunk there, as I mentioned
before.
I write
this partly, that all who marry, may take special heed that it be done with
great caution, and under due consideration, and the Lord sought to in it, that
it may be done in his counsel and not only nominally, but truly in his fear,
and then no doubt that it will be well with both husband wife. Being equally yoked, such will not only be true helpers in all things belonging
to this life, but more especially in things appertaining to the world that is
to come, and the good of the immortal soul, which to the faithful people of the
Lord is of great value. Oh! how happily
and peaceably do such live together in the Lord, as they keep to that which
thus joined them: there is more in it, both as to the parents and their
posterity, than it is to be feared many think of, as is apparent in the many
forward and unequal marriages of which I have made observation.
One
remarkable passage occurs, which happened thus: My father having been at the
Presbyterian meeting, and come home, he, as his manner was, put me or my
brother upon reading the priest’s text, which had been that day in Daniel,
concerning his being cast into the den of lions, for not regarding the king’s
decree, but on the contrary, he prayed to the God of heaven with his windows
open toward Jerusalem, after his wonted manner. My father made his observations as my brother read, and very much
magnified Daniel, and said, the Spirit of God was in him, but that there were
none such as him in our days. I owned
that he was indeed an extraordinary man, but in that there were none endowed
with a measure of the same spirit in any degree, I dissented from him, and gave
my father a brief account of the many sufferings of our Friends, some of which
were past, and some then under sufferings for the word of God and the testimony
of Jesus, which they bore for him, and especially the great sufferings of our
dear Friends in New England, viz: hard imprisonments, cruel whippings, cutting
off ears, and banishment if they returned into New England any more. I showed him likewise, how they put to death
Marmaduke Stevenson, William Robinson, William Leddra and Mary Dyer, for no
other cause but labouring to turn people from darkness to light, and from the
power of Satan to the living power of God, to his light, grace and Holy Spirit
in their hearts, and labouring to bring the people from persecution, pride, and
every evil work and way, to live a self-denying, humble life, a life agreeably
to the Christianity they professed.
This was the service they were called to, and so deeply suffered for:
from whence I inferred, there was somewhat of the Spirit of God in man in these
days, as there was in Daniel, and many more formerly, which helped and bore
them up in their great sufferings. My
father confessed, it was true some suffered for good, and some for evil; and
said, he had now lived to the age of about sixty-five years, and although he
heard us telling of a principle, or light within, yet he knew not what it
was. I replied very meekly, I f he
would hear me, I would tell him what it was; which I did in the following
words: When at any time thou has been
under a temptation to put forth thy hand to steal, or to lie for advantage, or
by provocation to swear, or any evil work or word, hast thou not found
something in thee, that hath showed thee
thou oughtest not to say or do so, which, if thou hast taken heed to,
and not said or done wrong, hast thou not found great peace and inward comfort
in thy mind? But if thou hast said or
done wrong, hast thou not found great disquietness and trouble of mind? This is the inward principle, light, or
grace, that God hath placed in man to help and direct him, which we the people
of God called Quakers, do hold agreeably to the Holy Scriptures. My father smote his hands together, and
confessed it was true.
There was
one thing worthy of notice, which may be duly considered by all who read or
hear it. When I mentioned Marmaduke
Stevenson, that good man, and great sufferer in the cause of Christ, my mother
said, it was true; for she lived a servant with Edward Wilberfoss, an honest
Quaker in Skipton, where Marmaduke Stevenson was a day labourer, about the time
he had his call to go to New England. [See the account of New England judged,
not by man as man, but by the Spirit of the living God, written by George
Bishop.] If I remember right she said, He was such a man as she never before
knew, for his very countenance was a terror to them, and he had a great heck
upon all the family; if at any time any of the servants had been wild, or any
way out of the truth, if they did but see him, or hear him coming, they were
struck with fear, and were all quiet and still; if any of the children came
into the house where he laboured, and he would not have it to come, these were
his words, Go thy way; or, Go home, lest I whip thee; and they were subject and
quiet. This account, I thought had some
reach upon my father, however, it much affected my mind. Oh ! that we the professors of the same holy
Truth, may so live in it as to reign over every wrong thing in ourselves and in
others, especially in our children.
Some little
time before the marriage of my mother, I was brought into the public work of
the ministry, concerning which I had many reasonings, being young, scarcely
eighteen years old, and naturally of a stammering tongue, which I could not
overcome; although I used what endeavors lay in my power as a man, considering
my years and education, all would not do until the Truth helped me. But after my many conflicts, troubles and
temptations, the worst I ever met with, and the most piercing sorrow I had been
in since I came to the knowledge of the blessed Truth was, when through reasonings,
disobedience, and an unwillingness to comply with the Lord’s requirings, he in
his displeasure took away from me the comfort of his holy presence for several
months together. Oh! the tribulations I
met with in this condition! No tongue is able to express, nor any creature to
conceive the depth of the heart-piercing sorrows I was in. I thought my state was as bad as Jonah’s,
for surely if there be a hell upon earth, I was in it. What greater hell can be here to a quickened
soul, and an enlightened understanding, who hath tasted of the goodness of God,
and in degree of the powers of the world to come, than to be deprived thereof,
and think they are fallen away from this state? I could scarcely believe I should ever have repentance granted to
me, or be restored to the love and favour of God, when I found that river of
life dried up, as to me, which did before not only make me, but even the whole
city of God truly glad. Being left
under an apprehension of the Lord’s displeasure, and in part a partaker of the
terrors of his wrath, oh! I thought surely the very mountains and hills, were
not sufficient, if they could have been put into the balance, to have weighed
against my troubles and afflictions, they were so great. But as the Lord by his judgments had brought
me in a good degree from the vice and vanity of this world, now by his
judgments he made me willing to give up to answer his requirings in part, and
in my obedience to him I began to feel some comfort of love and fellowship of
the Spirit of the Lord in myself, and in his people, who were partakers of the
like fellowship.
Now I
return to the matter about my being turned out of my father’s house, which I
mentioned before, but was willing to keep this solemn account entire, with
desires it may be a caution to all, in whom the Lord is at work in the same
manner, not to reason or gainsay as I did, but to give up freely and cheerfully
to the will of God. When I saw I must
turn out, I thought it expedient to acquaint some worthy Friends with it, lest
any undue reflections should be cast upon the Truth, or Friends, or myself,
that if so, these Friends might be able to contradict them. So I acquainted Sebastian Ellethorp, and
that worthy minister of the Gospel, Benjamin Padley, two of the chief Friends
in Ellington Monthly Meeting; they came to my father’s house, and inquired the
reasons why I went away; if my father had anything against me concerning the
business he employed me in; and whether I was not faithful and diligent in all
his affairs he sent me about: he confessed I was; and thought none could exceed
me. They said, Well then, what is the
reason of that misunderstanding which is between thee and thy son-in-law? Is it about his going to meetings? When they
understood his reasons, which it was not hard to do, they expressed pity
towards me that I could have no more liberty; and they thought, as I was so diligent in his
business, if he would give me a little more liberty to go to meetings, it would
be more encouragement to me. At which he took offence, gave the good men
rough language, and asked, what they had to do with him and his son; and bid
them go home, and mind their own business; which they were troubled at,
especially for my sake, and wondered how I had lived with him so long; for he
said, in short, that there was no abiding for me there. But Sebastian Ellethorp told me, which was
mightily to my comfort, that my father had nothing against me, save concerning
the law of my God. This is the sense,
if not the words, of these wise and good men, which passed between them and my
father, as they expressed them to me; for I was not there when they were
together.
Notwithstanding
I pleaded with my father to let me stay until I could hear of a place, he would
not, though I was scarcely fit for service, being almost like an anatomy, as
the saying is, so that most who knew me, said, I would pine away in a
consumption; but turn out I must, and did, though I was weak, poor and low in
body, mind, pocket and clothes; for I
think I had but twelve pence in my pocket and very ordinary clothes upon my
back. Thus I took my solemn leave of
the family, with my heart full, but I kept inward to the Lord, an under Truth’s
government. Many tears were shed,
especially by my poor mother, when I
left them; my father said little, but appeared like one struck with wonder, to
see so much love manifested towards me by the family, and so much wishing that
I might not go away. I came out upon the great common
afore-mentioned, where I had had many solitary walks, but one like this, for
this reason, that I knew not where to go.
I then thought of Abraham, who was called out of Ur in the land of the
Chaldeans, as it is briefly mentioned by Stephen; but this was the difference
between us, he was called, I was forced out.
Although I had many friends, I could not be free to go to them, unless I
had known they had business for me, being not of a forward, but rather backward
and shy disposition. As I was walking
upon the common, the sense of my weak condition, not knowing whither to go, nor
where to lay my head came over me to that degree, that it appeared to me as
though my way was hedged up on every side, inwardly and outwardly. I thought myself like a pelican in the
wilderness, or as an owl in the desert, there appearing to me scarcely a man in
all the earth in my condition, every way considered; and in the sense and deep
consideration of my present wilderness state, I felt myself under a great
oppression of spirit, and my heart seemed full, like a bottle that wanted vent. I looked round about me to see that none
were near to see my tears, nor hear my cries, and in the very anguish and
bitterness of my soul I poured forth my complaints, cries and tears, to the
Judge of all the earth, who spoke to me and comforted me in this my deplorable
state, which was worse than Jacob’s when he lay upon the ground, and had a
stone for his pillow. He had his near
kindred to go to, who he might expect would receive him gladly, I had none to
go to but such as rather reviled me, and gave me hard language; but the Lord
said unto me, as if a man had spoke, Seek first the kingdom of heaven, and the
righteousness thereof, and all these things that thou standest in need of shall
be given unto thee. I then desired he
would be pleased to show me the place I should go to; and the Lord opened my
way, and showed me the house I should go to, and abide in for a time. I said, Good is the word of the Lord: I
believed, and it was a great means to stay my mind, and settle it in the Truth,
with full purpose of heart to follow the Lord and obey his requirings,
according to the knowledge and ability given me; yet reasonings attended
me. Soon after I came to the Friend’s
house in South-Cliff, viz: William Allon by name, I bound myself to him to
learn his trade of a weaver, and after I was bound, I found this good man loved
me and I loved him to the day of his death; he often said, he was blessed for
my sake, and all that appertained to him; for he was very poor, but increased
very considerably after I went to live with him.
Three
things stood in my way of answering the Lord’s commands as fully as sometimes I
should have done; first, a violent humour fell into one of my legs soon after I
was bound apprentice, which I with others thought was much occasioned by hard
usage, heats and colds, and many surfeits, even from my infancy. The lameness held me about two years, and it
much discouraged and disabled me. The
second hinderance was, my low circumstances in the world, which very few knew
of, because the common fame was, and not without some truth, that I had rich
parents. Few knew the straits I met
with; yet my truly religious master, if he understood any thing was upon my
mind to go to visit any meeting or meetings, would say, take my mare and go thy
way, and be not uneasy, neither about the mare nor business; and do not hasten
thyself. These kindnesses made me often
thoughtful how I might return suitable acknowledgements, and be duly grateful
for the same. I was diligent in my master’s business, not serving him with
eye service, but faithfully; believing it good and acceptable in the sight of
God, and I had great peace in it; my master never found fault with me for doing
too little, but often for doing too much, and would sometimes say, I think thou
wilt cleave to the beam; come off and let us walk into the fields and see how
things are there. The healing of my
leg, I attribute to the great and good providence of God; for in a short time
after I gave up freely and cheerfully to answer the Lord’s requirings, the Lord
healed me of my lameness.
As for the
third hinderance, when I cried unto him, that he would also heal my tongue of
its stammering, believing that the Lord was able to take away this impediment,
as he was to stop the violence of the humour in my body: notwithstanding
several men had given me their advice,
and had showed their skill, which all proved ineffectual, until I came to
believe in Jesus Christ, and to press through all to him, and to touch the
skirt, or lowest appearance of his blessed truth and power, in which I found
true healing virtue to my soul, and also to my body, and to my tongue, even to
my admiration; so that I did not only speak plain in the testimony the Lord
gave me to bear, but also spoke plain in my common intercourse with men.
I was also
in these days under the dispensation of openings and visions, and bethought
myself as it were upon Mount Pisgah, and saw into the holy land, into things
relating to God and his heavenly kingdom, and into his work and way of bringing
man out of the fall and alienation, to himself again, and into a heavenly state
in Christ, as man yields true obedience to the leadings and operation of his
blessed grace and Holy Spirit in the heart.
But under such dispensations it is of absolute necessity, that man be brought
into true self-denial, into a depending frame of mind, and resignation of his
will to the will of God, and a daily sitting as in the dust, as to the motions
and workings of the creature; for all that is of man’s working, does but hinder
the spiritual work of God in the heart.
And we must come truly to know all fleshly motions and the workings in
man’s own will and spirit, to be silenced, in order to hear the voice of God,
which is a still small voice, and not to be heard in the noise and hurries of the
world; neither when the mind is busied with things agreeable to our own corrupt
wills and depraved nature.
Although I
had clear sights into many heavenly things, and also at times had comfortable
enjoyments of the living presence of God, yet I wanted to be more established
in the unchangeable Truth, of which I had some comfortable feeling. In crying to the Lord, I found he inclined
unto me, and, as David said, he heard my cries, and plucked my feet out of the
mire and clay, and set them upon a rock, that was higher than I, and in part,
established my goings, and put a new song into my mouth, even high praises unto
the Lord for all his tender mercies to me in these trying times. And now being more crucified to the world,
and the spirit of it, I witnessed a more constant indwelling of his heavenly
power and living presence, light and grace; I came to be brought into
stillness, and it was most agreeable to my condition to keep much in silence,
and wait upon the Lord for the renewing of strength, that thereby I might
surmount all temptations and trials with which I might be tried, which were not
a few.
These
things are worthy of commemoration, and proved great confirmations to me in the
Truth, in these days of my tribulations and great trials; read and believe,
thou that canst, for they are faithful and true sayings. After the Lord had healed me, he sent me
forth in the work of the ministry, and the first journey I took was southward
into Lincolnshire, Nottinghamshire, and through Coventry, and so to Warwick, to
see William Dewsbury. One thing is
remarkable; in giving him an account of the particular towns and places I had
passed through, in answer to his inquiry what way I came, I mentioned Coventry,
which was the last and the worst; for some of the rude people flung stones at
me, with great violence, as I was speaking in the meeting, so that had the Lord
suffered them to hit me, they must have spoiled me; but my faith in the Lord,
and the strength of the Truth, bore up in my mind above the fear of what wicked
men could do to me. After William had
heard my account, he fixed his eyes on me, and said, thou must go back again to
Coventry. I appeared unwilling for two
reasons: first, because I thought I had cleared myself of that people;
secondly, I thought it not safe to run into the danger of suffering, unless I
was satisfied the Lord required it of me.
But William was positive and said I must go, for there was a service for
me to do there. Upon a deliberate
consideration of the matter, and seeking to the Lord o know his will in it, I
found my way clear to go, and I had some service and good satisfaction, and
left Friends nearer to one another than when I first met with them; for there
had been a misunderstanding amongst some Friends in that city. I came from thence to Tamworth, where there
was a difference, especially between two Friends; both of whom had made some
considerable figure among Friends. I
felt it upon me to go to one of them, and warn him of the spirit of prejudice
and envy, for if he gave way to it, it would eat out his love to Friends and
Truth, and he would decline meetings and come to naught, and turn his back on
the Truth; which came to be fulfilled, as I afterwards heard; for he became a
loose man, and listed himself to be a soldier.
I was zealous for the name of the Lord, and had a great concern upon my
mind for the promulgation of the Truth, and where I met with loose professors
of the Truth, it was a great exercise to me.
When I
returned home from this, and indeed from all my journeys, I took care so far as
my weak body was capable, to fall into business, and not to loiter away my
time, neither abroad nor at home. My
weak constitution would not well bear the weaving trade, therefore I left it
much against my will; but I wrought upon clock and watch work, and many other
things, which supplied my necessities, the Lord allowing me as much time at
home as put me in a condition fit for traveling, and then I was inclined to go
to visit Friends. Many things I omit,
because I am not willing to swell my account too much. I traveled through most parts of England
four times, and twice through most parts of Wales, between the twentieth and
twenty-eighth year of my age.
After the
Lord had opened my heart, and I came in part to understand the Holy Scriptures,
and to have a feeling of that Holy Spirit in which the holy penmen wrote them,
and a sympathy with the spirits and exercises of the righteous therein
mentioned, I took great delight in reading them, and having a good memory,
could thereby the better deal with priests and with professors. I had many disputes and reasonings with
persons of several denominations, both in Yorkshire and other parts in my
travels, so that through these disputes, and much reading, my mind was rather
too much in the letter, and not altogether as much in spirit and in power, as
it should have been; for which I met with a gentle caution from the Lord, which
was thus: I heard a voice from the
Lord, as plain as if one had spoken to my outward ear, “the fowls of the air
lodge in the branches.” This being
repeated to me, I besought the Lord o show me what was the meaning of that
voice which I heard; and the Lord, the mighty God, showed me, in his
condescending love, that the Scriptures, even all of them which were written as
the holy men ere moved of the Holy Ghost, sprung from the living root; yet
those who rested only in the letter, and came not to be acquainted with, and
live in, and minister from the same Holy Spirit, are outward, dead, dry, airy,
and foolish. This gentle check was of
great service to me; not so as to make me decline reading the Scriptures, but
that I should not have overmuch dependency on them; and to caution me against
the neglect of waiting for the help of the Holy Spirit, the root and pure
spring of the right and living ministry, which reaches the heart and carries
the true evidence with it to the believers, that it is of God; which that of
the letter cannot do itself. I tenderly
desire that all concerned in this great work of the ministry may not be ministers
of the letter only, but of the spirit and of power. Let him that speaketh, speak as the oracle of God, and he that
ministereth, do it as of the ability that God giveth. This is the last and lasting ministry, which is after the order
of Melchisedeck, and not after the order of Aaron, but in Jesus Christ, the
high priest, the one offering, which makes perfect for ever all who came to him
through the drawings of the Father. He
is the one Lord, and there is but one true faith in him, and but one true and
saving baptism into him, or into the likeness of his death; that as Christ died
for sin, we may truly die to sin; and as he was raised by the glory of the
Father, so we may walk in newness of life.
He is the heavenly High Priest, holy, harmless, separate from sinners;
who was tempted and knows how to succour such as are tempted; he is the
Advocate with the Father, the Propitiation for the sins of all, the true Guide
and Comforter, the Leader of them into all truth who obey and follow him;
although to the world a Reprover and a swift Witness against all ungodliness
and unrighteousness of men.
My writing
thus from this gentle check, concerning the fowls and the branches, is not with
the least intention either to lessen the Holy Scriptures, or discourage any
from reading them; for I would have all true Christians encouraged to be more
conversant in them; yet with this advice, kind reader, from thy well-wisher and
true friend, to breathe to, and truly seek after the Lord for a measure of his
holy and blessed Spirit, the only key and best expositor to open and truly
expound them to thee, as by the same Holy Spirit, thy mind and understanding
comes to be fitted and enlightened.
Indeed, the whole vessel must be brought into a preparation to hold the
heavenly treasure, and not to mix the pure with the corrupt and impure: for
without this enlightening, preparing,
opening, and sanctifying gift of God’s holy grace and spirit, man can neither
know the heavenly power of God, nor yet the Holy Scriptures aright, as he ought
to know them. And for this reason it
hath seemed good to God to hide these things from the learned, wise, and
prudent of the world, that they should not pry into, nor find out the mysteries
contained therein, unless they are sanctified, and called of God thereto; as no
man knows the things of a man, save the spirit of a man that is in him; likewise the things of God are not
perceivable by man, without the help of the Holy Spirit of God in man.
Thus, the
lord opened to me the true meaning of the parable of the mustard-seed, in this
the time of my infancy as to the ministry, with which he sent me forth into the world, that my faith might stand in the
Lord alone, the author and finisher, as well as giver of the true and saving
faith, even that faith which works by love, and gives victory over the
world. It was by and through the power
and efficacy of true faith, which is the gift of God, that the elders in former
ages obtained, and now obtain a good report; it was through this gift, that
worthy Abel with his offering was accepted of God, although he was envied of
his evil-minded brother Cain, and also by him slain memorable Enoch, through
the virtue of this holy gift, walked with God, as himself gave witness that
Enoch pleased him; he walked so in faith and obedience even unto the end, that
he died not as men in common do, but was translated, or changed in a
peculiar manner. Come, read, thou that canst, and understand,
thou that are redeemed out of the power of the first nature, and hast overcome
the flesh, the world and the devil, in a great measure; for thou knowest that
it is by the operation of this gift that the dead in old Adam are raised to a
new life and way of living, in the new man, and through this heavenly Adam,
that is known to these to be a quickening spirit, agreeably to holy wit. Through faith the violence of fire was
quenched, the mouths of lions stopped, the sword turned backward, and armies
put to flight, even such as were aliens or strangers, who outwardly fought
against the Lord’s people; which sets before us, as in a glass, how and what we
are to overcome in this Gospel-day, in which we are not to fight with men, but
with our lusts, and to overcome sin and satan; which is as great a victory as
he obtained who overcame the rampant lions, that had dominion over the wicked,
as sin and satan have power and dominion over the wicked and ungodly to this
day,
Consider
now in time, thou that readest these
lines, whether Christ or antichrist doth predominate in thee; whether grace or
sin most abound in thy mortal body; whether the Spirit of Truth, that leads
into all truth, or the spirit of error, that leads into all error and untruth,
is the most prevalent, and hath the greatest place in thy heart. For to him to whom thou art the most subject,
and yields thy members servants, his servant thou art; and to him to whom thou
givest way and subjects thyself, his servant thou wilt altogether come to be in
time, and the wages due to his servants thou shalt have given to thee at the
end of thy work. Therefore consider in
due time, while the day of thy visitation is continued unto thee, and the Lord
is following and calling thee by his secret checks and reproofs, by which he
disquiets thy mind, that although thou mayest take some pleasure in vanity and
wrong ways, when thou canst get over the just witness of God in thy own soul,
yet while it strives with thee to convert and gather thee out of earthly and
fading pleasures, to have thy mind set upon heavenly things and take pleasure
in the, thou wilt have no solid comfort in all thy lower enjoyments, but
condemnation and anguish of soul will attend thee, until thou either gets over
the witness, or leaves the evil. This
is the experience of the Lord’s people, who have been acquainted with the true
inward warfare, and also with the saints’ victory. Learn to follow Christ by the footsteps of the flocks of his
companions; although it be through great tribulations, it is the way to have
thy garments washed and made white in the mystical blood of the immaculate Lamb
of God. This is he, as John the Baptist
said, that taketh away the sins of the world.
Happy is every one that truly putteth on his lamb-like nature, his
humility, righteousness, and purity, and is covered with his Holy Spirit, and
lives and walks in and under the influence and conduct thereof to the end of
time.
When I had
travelled much of the time between my going forth, which was from about the
nineteenth to the twenty-seventh year of my age; finding some little respite
from the eight of that service, I inclined to settle a little closer to
business, but had little to begin any calling with. I had been a sojourner some time at Whitby, Scarborough, and
Bridlington; but upon seeking to the Lord to know what place I might now settle
in, though my inclination was for Whitby, yet it sounded in my ear,
Bridlington, Bridlington is the place
to settle in; and in the cross I repaired thither, and settled for some time,
keeping a little shop, and mending clocks and watches, as I had done for
several years past at times. My
settling there was of good service, for the Lord began to work mightily,
especially amongst the young Friends, so that in a few years many had their
mouths opened in testimony for the Lord, and a fine spring of heavenly ministry
was in that Monthly Meeting, the like I have not known in the same bounds, for
it is but a small Monthly Meeting, and hath been so ever since I knew it. Truth did mightily prosper, and Friends grew so in the ministry, that it became a
proverb, that Bridlington was become a school of prophets. This mighty work of the Lord, in these days,
is worthy to be chronicled and remembered among his worthy and noble acts; we
had many heavenly and good meetings, praised and renowned be the worthy name of
the Lord, now and for ever.
We had but
little discipline when I first settled in that place, but afterwards many
Friends’ hearts were stirred up in a holy zeal for the Lord, to promote
meetings for worship, and also for good discipline in the church, for they
began to see a necessity of coming up more in the practice of this very needful
work. Although some said, They could
see no need of such close order and discipline, I found it to be my way in the
truth to bear with such, if they were not irregular in their conversations; but
if they were disorderly, we dealt with them as the Lord opened our way in the
wisdom of truth; and thus bearing with the indifference of some on the one
hand, and encouraging the faithful and zealous on the other, way was made,
beyond my expectation, for the spreading of the truth, its testimony, and the
discipline thereof in those parts.
I had now
travelled and laboured much in the Lord’s work at home and abroad for about ten
years, but had not in all that time found my way clear to marry, although not
without some likely opportunity, and with such as were a great deal richer than
she was whom I did marry. But I was
afraid in this weighty affair to miss my way, knowing the great difference
there is between those who only profess, and they who possess the truth; those
who are only in the first and unregenerate state, strictly speaking, but the
sons and daughters of men, and such who are born again, not of flesh and blood,
but of that incorruptible Seed and living word of God which leads into a lively
hope, and brings forth a new and heavenly birth in man, that takes delight to
please and obey the Lord in all things, and so become sons, or children of God,
in a more spiritual and nearer relation that that of creation only; that is in
and through this great work of renovation, and being born again. As such live up to that Holy Seed and
regenerating principle, and as the same doth predominate and rule in man, in
this state man cannot sin, as the apostle said, with this reason annexed,
because His Seed (to wit, the Seed of God) remaineth in him. Thus walking in the light, and living in the Seed, Grace, or Holy Spirit, for
although the terms of it differ, the virtue and nature of it are indivisible;
some come to be gathered to walk with, and truly love Christ, the bridegroom of
the soul, and are brought into a greater nearness, truer sympathy, and unity of
spirit, than the world knows of. I believe,
and therefore truly speak it, the Lord gave me such a wife as really feared
him, loved truth and righteousness, and all such as she thought loved, and
especially such as lived in the truth; her name was Priscilla Canaby, daughter
of James Canaby. She was descended of
an honest family in the eastern part of Yorkshire, the only child her parents
left; they gave her a commendable education, though they did not leaver any
great portion; she was under the care of her uncle, Charles Canaby of
Bridlington, an honest Friend, who left something behind him in manuscript
concerning his convincement of the truth, and sufferings for the same; he was
convinced early, lived to a great age, and was a man of great service in those
parts where he lived.
I was in
the twenty-eighth year of my age when I married my wife, who was a woman of an
excellent temper, very affectionate, sober and prudent, loved retirement much,
and waiting upon the Lord, and the enjoyment of his presence, especially with
the Lord’s people, that they might also be made partakers with her of the like
favour; this was as her crown and kingdom while in this world, even from her
childhood; and to see Friends prosper in the truth was a matter of great
rejoicing to her. When we had been
married scarcely three years, the Lord raised her up to bear a public testimony
amongst Friends, which was very comfortable to them; and she had also the
Spirit pf grace and supplication,
measurably poured upon her, so that many with me did believe she had access to
the throne of God, and to that river which maketh truly glad the city of God.
She always freely gave me up to answer the service I believed the Lord
called for of me. She was taken from me
when we had been married about five years, in the twenty-eighth year of her
age, and died in a sweet frame of mind, and was sensible to the last. Her last words were, “he is come, he is
come, whom my soul loves; and my soul rejoices in God my Savior, and my spirit
magnifies him;” and so passed away like a lamb, I believe into a mansion of
glory, where her innocent soul will for
ever sing hallelujah to the Lord God and the Lamb, who is worthy of glory,
honour, salvation, and strength, now and for ever.
I might
enlarge much upon her virtue and worthiness, but in this, as in other matters,
it is my desire to avoid prolixity, yet I would notice the most remarkable
occurrences that have happened to me in the course of my pilgrimage. I have been much pressed by some of my
faithful brethren, and I believe it to be my duty, to leave some accounts for
the encouragement and comfort of others in the way and work of the Lord. One thing is worthy here to be inserted,
which had an astonishing effect upon my mind, which was thus:
As I was
walking in a plain field in the fore part of the day, not far from sea, betwixt
Bridlington and Broynton, my soul was in a deep concern, and at that time
exercised in meditation on the things of God, and also in fervent prayer to
him, for preservation from every hurtful thing: my mind was then brought into a
heavenly frame, I neither saw cloud over my mind, nor yet any in the firmament,
for it appeared to me a morning without clouds, though I had passed under
many. Soon after my mind was brought
into this heavenly frame, and as it were swallowed up in the heavenly and
internal presence of the Lord, I thought a bright cloud covered me, or caught
me up into it; whether I was standing, walking, or set upon the ground, or
carried up into the cloud in the body or out of the body, I know not to this
day; yet fear and reverence with bowing of soul, did possess me before the
great Majesty, at the glory of whose countenance men and angels fled and gave
way, and could not steadfastly behold the brightness and glory of the
countenance of the Son of the Highest, with the mighty God and Father, which
are one in power, greatness, goodness, and glory, who was before all things,
made all things, and upholds and fills all things that are good, with that
which is truly good, or at least is for a good end. Read this mystery, thou that canst, and learn to fear him that
hath power over both soul and body, to kill and cast into hell, for at one time
or another he will make thee fear him, when he brings thy sins to judgment,
whether it be now or hereafter. The
time hath been, is, or will be, in which the Lord, the Judge of both quick and
dead; hath doth, or will plead with thee and all flesh, as in the valley of
Jehoshaphat; therefore beware, lest thou make him wroth, as he was upon mount
Perizim, but be thou subject to the Lord, as faithful Moses was upon Mount Horeb,
or the Mount of God, when he obeyed his voice, and put off his shoes; do thou
obey, if it be to the putting away of the glory and wisdom of Egypt, or
learning, or what else is required of thee.
Oh, then thou art in the way to further service and wilt be enabled, as
thou continuest faithful, to go through all to God’s glory, and thy unspeakable
peace in the end.
Now as to
the last part of the vision, when I was swallowed up in the luminous presence
of Him that is first and last, the Alpha and Omega, I heard a voice, very
intelligible to that sensation I had then given me, saying, “Dost thou see how
pride and wickedness abound in the nation?”
I answered in much fear, Lord, I do see it; the next words which I heard
in the voice and in the cloud were, “The people are too many, I will thin them,
I will thin them, I will thin them.” I
desired of the Lord to show me whether it was his mind I should publish this in
any part of the nation? The south was set before, with this caution, “Where
this is opened to thee in my power, there speak of it, and not otherwise.” I gave up to answer the heavenly vision, and
visited most parts of the southern counties, as also the northern parts, and
Scotland; and where the Lord opened my mouth to speak of what I had heard, as
before, by way of prophecy, I gave up, but did not so much insist upon that
matter, as to suffer it to be a means to mislead me from that work of the
ministry I was chiefly concerned in. I
would that all, who are concerned in the like manner, may be cautious in this
great affair, and look well to the rise and original, whence they receive this
gift, and how; and also what frame of mind they are in, that nothing of the
warmth of their own spirits be set to work, either by the sight of the eye,
hearing or reading, but that the mind
may be redeemed from all workings which arise from these and the like grounds
and purely purged, and fitted to receive this gift of prophecy; and also be
sure to be very careful to be guidable in the gift, or otherwise thou mayest miss,
as to time and place, &c. I intend
not to dwell long upon it, as there are
other services included in this of prophecy, as edification and comfort,
&c, but what I have been upon relates to foretelling something that is to
come; and, as a worthy elder once said to me, when I was young in the ministry,
It is a great thing to know what, where, and when; and I have found it true to
this day. Learn of Him that is meek and
low of heart, and be not discouraged, but persevere in faith and sincerity, and
look not too much at the difficulty, but look over all to him who hath called
thee, and in some measure has revealed his Son through the Spirit in thee. Although I know, from some experience, what
it is to be exercised in the matter of prophecy, for in the journey touched of
before, I was concerned to tell Friends an Kinmuck, in Scotland, especially,
That the Lord would take many of them away: which in a short time came to pass,
for many died before that time twelve-month, it being a time of scarcity of
corn, and it was thought many died for want of bread, the year ensuing my being
there. I had good service for the Lord,
and great satisfaction in these my long travels, as I had in the like before in
divers of which some were convinced of the Truth.
At Cromer, in
Norfolk, one Elizabeth Horry, when my mouth was opened, despised my youth, as
she confessed afterwards; but what I had to say so reached her condition, that
she shed many tears upon her fine silks, and before the meeting broke up,
confessed, so that all might hear, in these words, “All that ever I have done
hath been told me this day, and this is the everlasting truth.” As I passed
along from that meeting, not far from Cromer, with some other Friends, it rose
in my heart to say aloud, so that a man who was watering his horse might hear,
looking and pointing my hand towards him – That man will be a Friend before he
dies; and, as he owned after, he was so struck with it, that he had no rest
till he came among Friends, though he was then afar off, but he came to be a
serviceable man among us, and his wife was also convinced of the Truth, and was
a serviceable woman. Samuel Hunt, of
Nottingham, was first reached at Leicester, by the testimony I had given me to
bear in that meeting at that time, as he acknowledged afterwards; but I always
gave God the glory, and laid the creature as in the dust, that man might not be
too much accounted of. After my hearing
the voice, as before mentioned, I had many deep and heavenly openings, some of
which it may not be amiss to mention here, inasmuch as I had now a more clear
sight into a translated sate than ever I had before. I came, through a Divine sense and participation, to have great
sympathy and dear unity, not only with the ever memorable Enoch, whose walking
was such that the Lord gave testimony that he pleased him; the ground of which
witness was from hence, that he lived near to, and loved God, and walked in the
ways of virtue, and abhorred ice; but also with the apostle, having this seal,
that God knoweth who are his: and with some other of the servants of Christ in
former ages who could say, as some now can say, from true experience, that the
Spirit of the Lord beareth witness with our spirits, that we are his, to wit,
the Lord’s children, so long as we do well; which last words are of large
extent, to do well, think well, speak well, and believe well; for he that has no faith, or that believes ill,
cannot do well. He that eats, drinks, or wears that which he knows he ought
not, doth not well; but what is done well, is done in a pure mind and clean
conscience, for so is true faith held, and all acceptable work to God
performed. I had great openings into the removal of Moses, and taking up of
Elijah, that great and worthy prophet, from the earth into heaven, and I have
seen things not fit to be uttered; neither can the world yet believe them. I saw far into the mystery of the
transfiguration of Christ, and the appearance of Moses and Elijah with him upon
the mount; and the voice which was heard from the excellent glory, “This is my
beloved Son, hear him;” not Moses nor Elias in comparison of him, for the law
pointed to him, and was as a school-master to bring to him. The holy prophets foresaw and prophesied of
his coming, and John the Baptist saw Christ, and baptized him, and bore witness
of him as the Light, and said, “Behold the Lamb of God, that taketh away the
sin of the world;” he also said, “he is the bridegroom that hath the bride,”
the church. He spoke of his own decrease
and unworthiness in comparison of Christ, though called by Christ himself, as
great a prophet as was ever born of a woman.
He was also called Elias, which must first come and is already come; in
respect of power, knowledge, boldness, and faithfulness, he was as Elias, yet
the lest in the kingdom of Christ was greater than he, because the power and glorious kingdom and Gospel
dispensation was not fully brought in
and restored to Israel, or those who should believe in him until his
ascension. But now these great agents
all passed away, with their figurative, prophetical, and elementary
dispensations, and gave place to the Son and Heir of all things, the Messiah,
the Great Prophet, Bishop, Shepherd, King, and Law-giver.
Read these
things, and learn truly to understand how Moses past away, and Elias past away,
and Christ is left, who is able alone to perfect the work of man’s redemption,
who trod the wine-press alone, and amongst all the sons of men, none were with
him or helped him. He came who was the
anti-type of all types gone before: he, Christ, is come to remove the covenant
made before, because of the weakness and imperfection thereof; which covenant
made not the comers thereto perfect, but the better hope brought in y Christ
did. This covenant is abundantly more
excellent and established upon better promises than that was or could be, by
the blood of bulls, goats, and the ashes of an heifer, which reached the
outside only. But in the second or new
covenant, there is the blood which sprinkleth the heart from an evil
conscience, so that such may be fitted and qualified to serve the living God,
not in the works of the old covenant, but in the newness of the Holy
Spirit. This is he that, as to his
divinity and eternity, was before the hills were settled, and the seas and
foundations were made, that took delight to dwell with the sons of men, or in
the habitable parts of the earth. As he
is a spirit, or word uncreated, he dwelt measurably in Able, Seth, Enoch, and
Noah, before the flood; for by his Spirit God strove with the old world to reclaim
them from their wickedness, when it was great.
It was by this Spirit, Noah was made a preacher of righteousness and
instructed how to build the ark. This
is he who was with Shem and Japeth, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Joseph, and all
the faithful fathers after the flood, the foundation of all the righteous,
prophets, apostles and martyrs, such as loved and believed in him, and suffered
for his name’s sake, and the testimony which they held. This is he that despised the glory of this
world, and is lifted up as a standard to the people, and an ensign to the
nations; unto him shall the Gentiles seek, and his rest shall be glorious. He hat lifted up a greater rod than that of
Moses, sometimes call the rod of iron, by which he hath, and, I believe will, break
to pieces many people as a potter’s vessel, when the sin and iniquity of the
people is come to the height It was he
that turned the waters of Egypt into blood; it was he that slew the first-born
throughout all the land of Egypt; he overthrew the Egyptians, and brought forth
Israel by a strong hand, and an outstretched arm. After he had marked the dwellings of his people, and spared them
in the time of this great slaughter, which was executed both upon man and
beast, to wit, the first-born in Egypt, then he became Israel’s Passover. These things that were done typically and in
an outward way, read inwardly and in thine own experience, that thou mayest
say, and that truly, Christ is my Passover, after he hath mitigated thy sore
bondage, and in degree given thee faith in his great name, and caused thee to
love him and made thee willing to follow him, although it be through the sea of
troubles, and sometimes s through the wilderness. Here is an eating of the heavenly Passover, or paschal Lamb,
under the influence of the pure love of God, that is spread over the soul like
a canopy, or banner; here is the heavenly manna, the true body to feed on, that
yields true nourishment and solid comfort to thy soul, in thy travel towards
the heavenly country; here the substance of the scape goat is known, that
beareth away the sins of the people, for he bore our iniquities, and through
his stripes we were healed. On his part
there wants nothing, but on man’s, faith in and obedience to Christ. He is the substance or antitype of the
brazen serpent, which was lifted up in the wilderness to cure the people’s
ailments, occasioned by the serpents; he is the advocate with the Father, as
John said, to encourage little children in that time, which I think may very
well be applied to all in that state until time here shall be no more. Happy is every one that heareth, obeyeth,
and reverenceth the Son and Heir of all things, in his spiritual appearance in
the heart, where he speaks to the conditions of the children of men, as never
man spoke, and to much better purpose than ever man could do. This is he that spoke to the fathers by his
prophets, who in these times doth speak to us in or by his Spirit; so take heed
to his spiritual appearance in the
heart, for there must the work of our salvation be perfected, after sin is
purged out, and the guilt thereof taken away
To such, death is easy, where sin, the sting of death is taken away,
having a part in Christ, the first-born of many bretheren, the rsurrectrion
from the dead – a part in him that is the resurrection indeed and the life;
over such the second death, which is a perpetual separation from the heavenly
presence of God and the company of holy angels, shall have no power. I now leave this digression, and return to
the historical part.
In my young
years, I was very much afflicted upon taking cold, with a sore throat, that I
could scarcely speak so as to be heard, and had much trouble at times to
swallow anything which nature required.
Ina journey northward, in Truth’s service, coming to Hawkshead, and
sitting in the meeting under no sall exercise with the trouble aforesaid, not
without some reasonings and conflicts of spirit, having left all , as I
believed, to do what the Lord required of me, and yet I apprehended myself, by
means of this affliction, not likely to be of any service; after some
reasonings, and a fervent seeking to the Lord to know the cause, and to bring
my mind to a true resignation to the will of God in this, and in all the trials
he might see good in his wisdom to
exercise me in; I had not been long brought into this resigned state to be and
do what the Lord would have me do, but oh! I felt of the virtue of Christ as a
sweet and living spring, by which I was healed. I was, and am to this day, when I remember the Lord’s kind
dealings with me, very thankful to him.
It has been frequently observable, that the Lord
leads his servants through many states,
that having the experience thereof, they may be the more capable of helping
others in the like straits; it is an excellent thing to love and truly believe
in Jesus Christ, and keep self down as in the dust forever.
Sight of his visit to America –Arrangements for Leaving – Voyage – Arrival – Dream – Virginia – North Carolina – Remarkable Stop while Preaching –Interview with a Rapacious Priest – Maryland – Pennsylvania – Parts with his Companion – New Jersey – Long Island – Rhode Island – New England – Dispute respecting the “Sacrament” – A Great Man of the World Brought Down – An Honest Presbyterian answered – Boston – Alarming Accident – Remarkable Meeting of Ministers and Elders – Nantucket – Mary Starbuck – Remarkable Meeting – Dispute concerning Faith – Remarks of William Penn – Lynn – Dispute with George Keith – Slanders of George Keith exposed and refuted – Interview with the Governor of Rhode Island – Dispute again with George Keith in Rhode Island.
Now the
time came again for my going into America, having had a sight of it about ten
years before. I acquainted my wife
therewith about a year before she died, and found it was likely to be a very
near trial to her. She was a virtuous,
good woman, but was taken away, and left me three small children, the
eldest not above four years old, the
youngest not much above one month old.
Having but little of this world, I reasoned much about going, thinking
my circumstances at present might excuse me; my intentions were good in it,
that I might not leave things in any way to the dishonour of the truth. My youngest child was taken away when about
a year old; and soon after, wherever I went, while I was awake, it sounded in
my ears several days and nights, Now is the time, now is the time. Providence so ordered it, that my other two
children were placed to mine and Friends’ satisfaction, I went through many
provings that no man knew of, but I believe, when I am gathered to my place, I
shall leave many brethren behind me in mutability, who will read my lines in
their own experience. I would not have
any to misunderstand me, for as to my outward circumstances, I left no debt,
neither was I in a way of going backward in the world; for after I received the
knowledge of the Truth, I could not see what pretence I could have to religion,
if any should lose by me. I have often
said, and been hearty in my intentions, that rather than truth should suffer on
that score, I would live upon bread and water, and wear very mean clothes, and
work very hard if I were able and upon any mean, but lawful calling It has been a matter of wonder to me , hw
persons who carry any pretensions to religion, dare run such great ventures,
sometimes beyond their own bottom or abilities; which to me hath always
appeared an unwarrantable risk, and I apprehend pride and ostentation are much
the occasion of it, which are against truth, and men are no better for their
greatness; for the more plain, and the more humble we are, the more we resemble
humble Jesus and his religion, which he labored to inculcate. If any are lifted up, or aspire above their
places, let them consider well the foregoing paragraph.
Now I must
leave my little children, and my very near friends, and native country, and all
for Christ and the Gospel’s sake, without any sinister end or view. I appealed to the Lord, in the simplicity of
my heart, that he knew I was willing to be at his disposal, and what he had
favoured me with, I could leave to him; yet whether what I had was sufficient
to defray mine and my two little ones necessary charges, was somewhat in my
way; and to satisfy me in this doubt, the lord’s voice sounded exceedingly
clear to that sensation I was then endued with, saying, “Go, and be faithful,
and I will bless the every way.” OH! my
heart seemed to melt, and my spirit to dissolve within me, and I said, Good is
the word of the Lord, thou hast not failed me in any of my great straits and
trials to this day; I have great cause to trust in thee; renowned be thy most
excellent name, now and forever.
I parted
from my friends with much brokenness of heart, and set forward on my journey
towards London, in order to take shipping there, the 11th of the
eighth month, 1700. With my companions,
Thomas Thompson, Josiah Langdale, John Estaugh, and some other Friends, I went
on board a ship in the river Thames, and we had not been long there,
considering our freedom about going in the ship, when it opened clearly in my
mind, in the light, that I must not go in that vessel; and I said to the
Friends, I could not go in her, for I saw nothing but death and darkness
there. The account of what afterwards
happened to the ship I had from two particular friends, in two letters written
from London to America, wherein they expressed a thankfulness for our
deliverance, and magnified that hand which wrought it, and preserved us from
going in that ship, which was lost near the island of either Jersey or
Guernsey, and as it was said, about seventy people were drowned.
I have seen
a Divine Providence attend terrene affairs; and I may mention some things that
appear to be of but little moment to some; and such as do not duly consider
these things, may make a wrong application; yet my travels have afforded a
variety of trials and transactions, which are in some things very peculiar, and
there is a willingness in my mind to favour some who have been desirous I
should leave a journal of my life, as far as I can see my way clear in the
Truth.
We went on
board another ship called the Arundel, Splenden Rand, master, in which we
embarked the 17th of the ninth month, 1700, and after many storms,
and much sea sickness, not without some conflicts of spirit, more than I am
free to confess, and a long passage, being nearly sixteen weeks upon the sea,
we arrived in the river Patuxent, in Maryland, as near as I remember, the 5th
or 6th of the first month, 1701, and my heart was glad, and filled
with acknowledgements and praises to the Lord, for bringing us safely over the
mighty waters.
We left the
ship and master, who was a churlish ill-natured man. I was very weak and low, both in body and mind, when I landed,
but the Lord helped me, and made my journey and labours comfortable to many, as
well as to my own soul. After the first
or second meeting we were at, John Estaugh being my companion, as we came near
a great house in Maryland, I espied a little white horse, the sight of which
put me in mind of a dream I had on board the ship before I landed, in which I
thought I got a little white horse, which carried me well, and many miles. I said to the Friends with me, Let us call
at this house, which we did, and upon inquiry about a horse, the man said he
had none but a little white young Galloway, as he called it, which he was
willing to sell, and told us, it carried him one day forty miles. He asked eight pounds sterling for it, and I
bade him five pounds sterling; the man’s wife coming up the passage, heard what
I had offered, and she said to her husband, It is enough; so I had him, and a
good horse he proved, and carried me, by a moderate computation, four thousand
miles. I took this, according to the
nature of it, to be a favour from that great Hand which led me forth, and
hitherto hath preserved me in the land of the living, to praise his ever worthy
name.
We set forward towards Virginia and North Carolina, and found great openness in these two provinces amongst the people, and a tender hearted remnant of Friends’ scattered in these wilderness countries. Although, as I said before, I was brought very low, yet the Lord, in whom I did, and yet do believe and put my trust, raised me, and many times filled my heart with his word and testimony, so that sometimes it went forth as a flame of fire amongst the loose libertines, who were proud and unfaithful, yet professors of the Truth; and we had many large and good meetings. One thing is worthy of notice; as I was speaking in a meeting in Virginia, a sudden stop came upon me, and occasioned me to say, I cannot go forward, whatever the matter may be, I know not; but giving over immediately, a Friend, whose name was Edward Thomas, began to preach, who was but young in the ministry, though an elderly man, and apt to be attended with reasonings. He said after the meeting, he had sought to the Lord with prayers, that he would condescend so far to his request, as to give me a sense of him, and in so doing he would take that as a great strength and confirmation to his ministry, in this day of may exercises and great fears; or much to the same effect. Thus we see the Lord in his great mercy condescends to the low, weak, and as it were, infant states of his children, like a tender father, and being our heavenly high priest, is touched with a feeling of the infirmities of his people; thanksgiving and honour be given to his most excellent name, now and for ever.