BEACH
Smarm Sanctuary
Inner Sanctum
Chapter 1 He thought briefly of Naomi, and grief closed around his heart
Chapter 2 Either was an end to the torment, the only goal he had left
Chapter 3 A fear so large he couldn't name it yet
Chapter 4 Listening for the sound of that heart, and its truth. Finding his own there.
Chapter 5 Though he had nothing to give, not even his own self left to offer, he tried
Chapter 6 He hadn't known anything could be worse than Jim's madness
Chapter 7 This time, Blair stayed down
Chapter 8 All that strength and beauty held in abeyance, in sacrifice
Chapter 9 But his heart was naked
Chapter 10 Blair felt the white heat again
Chapter 11 In the soft silence of the fog-bound morning like a lost god
Chapter 12 Closer to the end of the hurting
Chapter 13 Beating in his breast like a living thing
Chapter 14 Whatever it takes, Jim. Now and forever.
Chapter 15 His heart taking over before his mind could convince him not to try
Chapter 16 The gulls were getting louder
Chapter 17 It was the end of Jim's life
Chapter 18 Blair heard the surrender in his voice
Chapter 19 Surrounded entirely by Blair's living presence
Chapter 20 Blair decided he would not speak again
Chapter 21 His eyes were open, clear, their brilliant blue more achingly bright than the morning sky overhead
Chapter 22 Rest, Jim. I'll be right here
Chapter 23 The memories could still be read plainly, scrawled across his body
Chapter 24 He wouldn't allow Blair to partake of such a bitter feast
Chapter 25 Deaf and blind, at peace
Chapter 26 Quiet blueness as he looked into Blair's eyes
Chapter 27 Though his voice was furious, his touch was gentle
Chapter 28 All I had to do was get you off the beach, and then everything would be all right
Chapter 29 His entire life had been only prologue and preparation for this moment at Jim's side. Nothing else would ever matter so much.
Chapter 30 Jim in agony, beyond his help forever
Chapter 31 Didn't I promise you that? Didn't I promise?
Chapter 32 Blair must love your strength
Chapter 33 He would take his death, if they wouldn't give it to him
Chapter 34 As though a soul in hell had been granted voice
Chapter 35 Nothing I hate more than getting caught in the rain
Chapter 36 A pristine white beach in the heat of mid afternoon
Chapter 37 His weakness had brought Jim to this, and Jim's weakness had let him do it
Chapter 38 Soul stripped bare as his flesh
Chapter 39 The same strength that would take them both home
Chapter 40 For the courage that made him strong, for the strength that made him beautiful
Chapter 41 A man who could touch him that way loved him enough to make anything possible
Chapter 42 I'll be more careful next time
Chapter 43 The hills were still dusky with the flush of spring
Chapter 44 The heat of a tear scalded his thumb
Chapter 45 Souvenirs of the journey
Chapter 46 A glimpse of the life Blair would help him reclaim
Chapter 47 The ease their closeness brought him
Chapter 48 Blair's faith and laughter
Chapter 49 No music and damned little grace
Chapter 50 Rest, and I'll be right here
Chapter 51 Had kind of a rough night
Chapter 52 The painful, joyous weight
Chapter 53 Accepting without surrendering
Chapter 54 The ocean of betrayal in Blair's eyes
Chapter 55 They hurt him
Chapter 56 Like talking to a crazed jumper
Chapter 57 Needles of language
Chapter 58 Might be great coffee
Chapter 59 Blair's smile was almost enough
Chapter 60 Cold and heavy going down
Chapter 61 The drift was fast and easy
Chapter 62 Seeping into their combined soul and darkening Blair's eyes
Chapter 63 Smiled back at him with contented trust
Chapter 64 Without anyone losing a finger
Chapter 65 You're not going to believe this, man, but I haven't got anything to say
Chapter 66 As though Blair had taken the pain first
Chapter 67 Such a minor, fragile victory
Chapter 68 We're done with room service
Chapter 69 Used everything up and not finished the job
Chapter 70 Feeling quite young
Chapter 71 The spaces between gasped breaths
Chapter 72 Constellations of time and agony
Chapter 73 No son of mine
Chapter 74 From the May to the roses
Chapter 75 His father's house
Chapter 76 Not innocent
Chapter 77 Low and golden through the windows
Chapter 78 He was all alone
Note: When this story is complete, a revised and re-edited version will be released in print. The zine will be illustrated by Marty Siegrist and published by Monte Cristo - Amethyst Press as a high-quality collector's edition with a limited print run. If you are interested in reserving a copy of the zine, write to Kitty.
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